New Rule: The more complicated the Starbucks order, the bigger the asshole. If you walk into a Starbucks and order a "decaf-grande, half-soy, half-low fat, iced vanilla, double-shot, gingerbread cappuccino, extra dry, light ice, with one Sweet-n'-Low, and one NutraSweet, oooh, you're a huge asshole.
But shouldn't we partly blame Starbucks for giving people the option to ask for such a ridiculous drink?
I think so.
We all have our pretentious asshole moments; I've always wanted to walk into Shaper Image and say, "Excuse me, I need a sound system that will properly convey the brilliance of Rimsky-Korsakov's Scheherazade while providing me with equal quality when I listen to Felix Mendelssohn Bartholdy's Song Without Words and Khachaturian's Gayane ballet suite."
Mmmyes.
Everyone has the occasional need to prove their higher-rank in something.
I wanted to be a foreign literature major for the sole purpose of going to late-night coffee shops and beating down the hipsters with my extensive knowledge in classic Russian literature.
But all that heavy reading is exhausting; I'd much rather dig up bones and pieces of pottery for a living.
We also have the jealousy moments.
You want others to know of your complicated and impressive taste in music and films but you don't actually want other people to become fans.
I want you to know that I appreciate Paris Combo--and I want you to appreciate that I appreciate Paris Combo--but I don't want you to also appreciate them.
And when the person starts becoming a fan, you become slightly jealous and then go on a quest to search out a new band/film/book that has yet to be touched by your fellow peers so you can continue this cycle of one-upping each other in your knowledge of all things that ultimately don't matter in life.
Ah, humans are hilarious.
They're making me watch Lucky Number Slevin; I should probably tend to that.
3 comments:
I was just told to watch that. Hey I really like this band that no one has ever heard of their stylings are an echo of the transendeltelist movement but with the bitterness of Hemingway's expatiratism. . . .
made that up but what you say is true my friend.
Eh, it wasn't that great. At least go into it knowing that it was definitely not the new Pulp Fiction.
Be sure to use the word "postmodern" next time. Whether or not it pertains to the situation is irrelevant because most people don't even know what it means, they just know that it's supposed to be impressive.
oh for sure my mistake. Yeah, It was entertaining but . . .who said it was the new Pulp Fiction ? Nothing is the new Pulp Fiction! It has a realism and postmodernist touch that cannot be echoed, not to mention the drawings on existentiol ideas relating to the late Camus. . . whatever
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