Get that corn out my face!

Check out my new widget.
I don't know what a "widget" is but the word intrigued and/or seduced me.
Might as well dress up the blog to make up for a lack of substance... and all that implies.

I had to work this morning and it was unbelievably lame.
Not only that, but I had a huge line from the moment the doors opened at 11 am to the moment I left seven hours later.
Why weren't people at home opening presents or being with their families?!
Because of them, I had to work on Christmas morning.
Well... because of them and because of the lovely folk at Dreamworks for putting out a non-exciting picture on Christmas day.
However! Pity is a powerful thing and I received enough tips to go out to lunch this week without breaking out the ATM card and a random customer thanked me for working on the holidays by giving me a Starbucks gift card, plus time and a half for working on a major holiday.
Ah, greed.

So, the question on everybody's mind is:
Would I be willing to pay $31/month for this lovely piece of wood and silver?
The answer is:
Yes, I'd be willing. In fact, I'll offer the first month's payment right now from the tips I made this afternoon but with a job like mine there is no room for me to give up that amount of money a month.

It's time to start the tedious task of looking for a new job.
I've worked Christmas eve, Christmas morning, Thanksgiving, Halloween (not that I was completely depressed about that one...), have never willingly been given a weekend off and am forced to serve terrible and over-priced coffee without a Starbucks label slapped on the side of the cup.
Plus, I'm never going to get that Clarinet.

Dirty Laundry

My bank account is bone dry thanks to the holidays.
It's cool; I'm really not stressed about it.
I just can't believe there is no possible way to avoid spending money.
Bone. Dry.











The other night on Conan O'Brien, Jeremy Irons said about Paris Hilton,
"I want to squeeze her to see if she makes noise."
I can't say I've ever felt the same desire to...squeeze Paris Hilton.

Last night I had a dream that I got the tattoo I've been coveting for the past few months.
Unfortunately, the tattoo artist screwed up the design and it ended up looking like a decapitated sparrow.
FORTUNATELY, the tattoo wasn't going to be permanent for a few days so he just wiped it off and in return gave me a free ticket to Tokyo to get a real tattoo.
I liked the feeling of having the tattoo, I disliked the feeling of having a decapitated bird on my back.
I then had a second dream where Edward Norton and I were camp counselors at a camp for adults.
He turned out to be a jerk. What the Hell, Edward?

I need to stop eating things before I go to bed.

Which Paleolithic Bison Heard Are You?

Took my archaeology final this morning.
I'm going to miss the class, indeed. I learned quite an extensive amount of information in a few short weeks.
But mostly, I'm just going to miss looking at my teacher in all of his buff, tan, Indiana Jones glory.

I'm not going to lie, it was a definite plus.

Balkanization Of Amerikanization

There's a chip in my $5 zebra shell earring and I just keep picking at it and picking at it and making it bigger and bigger and...

I don't want to go home; I feel like if I go home I'm going to have to be productive.
The problem with this is that I always plan to be productive but imminently let myself down by sitting in front of the computer/television for a few hours and then driving around for awhile doing nothing in particular.
I don't like disappointing myself in such a way.
Or, it's the exact opposite and I stay up really late studying/finishing an assignment and then plan to nap when I get home but end up getting myself involved in a project or going out with people.

Read This!
If they passed such a ban in Oregon, I would no longer have to serve that disgusting partially hydrogenated soy bean oil from a plastic jug.
Otherwise known as popcorn butter.
Whenever a customer asks if it's real butter I can't help but snort and shake my head fervently and discourage them from soaking their kernels in it.
It's always the same answer, "Oh, then I better not."
Yes. "Better not," indeed.

I've already had coffee but there's a book in my hand and a coffee shop one block away that is calling my name.
Far be it for me to deprive it of my presence.
























Eeeeeew.

"Dude, she totally digs you!" "You think?" "No."

(Hahaha)